lonely

it's almost my birthday but i'm not happy.

i've never felt so lonely before. i feel like i have no one to talk to who will understand how i feel. i need a friend but my friends are busy and i don't think they'd understand how i'm feeling.

let me just let it all out..

i hate you. i hate you for making me feel this way. i hate the fact that i still love you after everything that you do to me. i hate you! you make me feel insecure. i hate you! you made me lose my confidence. i hate you! i hate you! i hate you!

trying

i'm trying hard...really hard...but it seems i can't do it. =(

i have been trying for months to forget what you said to me.

i'm trying my best not to get affected.

i'm trying to let you go but i can't. i keep finding myself holding on to you.

i am hurting because of my stupidity.

after all the hurt i've suffered, i still love you...but i wish i don't. =(